Word Use

Wine Shoppe, where I work, has a pretty high turnover.  I have been there for almost 6 months and have seen at least 5 people start and quit in that time.  There's a lot of reasons for this, the pay is really only a little over minimum, some of the staff can be assholes, and people decide they have other places to be.  All that said I have gotten used to introducing myself to a lot of people, who I am, what I do, etc etc.  The part where this apparently messes other people up a little is when I say that I moved to town because my partner goes to grad school.

Long story short I have now had a number of conversations with people about how they thought I was gay.  I've never been offended by these assumptions, but its made me wonder how much people read into a simple two word phrase.  I mean, the reasons I say "my partner" are pretty simple.  The relationship my SO and I have is more serious than "boyfriend and girlfriend" connotes, and people look at me strangely when I call her "my comrade."

The new people are usually confused and try to clarify, but subtly.  Subtly, enough that I can't tell whether or not they misspoke.

New Girl: What does he study?
Me: Who?
New Girl: Your partner, at Big-Fancy-U?
Me: Oh she's in the Department, studying Thing-Thats-Explanation
New Girl: (thinking) Did he say "he's" or "she's"
Me: (thinking) Wait did she say "he"?
(awkwardly continue conversation briefly, what I think about Town of Big-Fancy-U etc)
Me: I'm gonna go make sure there's enough booze over there, in a different part of the store.

Exit


Because there's no good way to say "Do you think I'm gay?  Because I'm not gay, and you have made a mistake.  A mistake that I've noticed, and I'm judging you on." (Town of Big-Fancy-U is a very liberal place, a good thing)  Anyway, I dealt with the last one via an intermediary.  Asking Less New Girl to  work it into conversation because New Girl had made a lot of "he" comments and most people in Wine Shoppe know that my partner is a lady.  I could see this being very embarrassing for her if someone mentioned it to her after she'd been around for a while.
 
This apparently worked.

I hear we're hiring more people in a couple of weeks.